The art of SIMPLE Listening™

As the world becomes increasingly polarised it becomes a threatening place for most of us. The “other side” is threatening and dangerous. It is therefore more important than ever to listen to each other with compassion and kindness. Because we see the world through the state of our nervous system, when we feel threatened, we act from a place of defence rather than a place of safety, thus creating more barriers and protections, and further increasing polarisations. It becomes a negative feedback loop.

Global politics seems to dictate that we must separate from people who are different from us. Across the world, communities are being divided by polarising politics. We inherently think people who are like us are safer to be around. We are tribal. But we also thrive on diversity.

 Can biological safety help us trust others?

How then would our world society look if we all acted from a place of safety where we can trust and interact with people who are different from us and have different opinions, without feeling threatened? According to neuroscientific research, if we can train our nervous systems to feel safer as a default, then we start moving away from defensive actions towards a place of easeful healthier relating.

SIMPLE Listening™ does just that. It is a Polyvagal-informed programme which fosters biological safety in the nervous system which then leads to a feeling of easeful interconnection with others, rather than separation, isolation, and threat. Regulating the autonomic nervous system gives us more choice in how to act in any given situation, no longer feeding the dysfunction of an overstimulated sympathetic nervous system.

An overactivated sympathetic nervous system leads to a feeling of wired but tired. In this survival mode we make poor choices. Until we realise that we can affect change in our nervous system, we often feel victim to our situation. However, by fostering safety and flexibility in our nervous system, we find we have more choice in how to respond in any given moment.

 Listen to the environment with somatic intuitive awareness

SIMPLE listening™ is a programme that educates the practitioner to listen to their environment using somatic intuitive awareness. Its objective is to gain autonomic nervous system regulation and a conscious relationship to self, other, and the environment. Many of the exercises involved bring a sense of deep physiological safety through stimulation of the social engagement cranial nerves, utilising both the sensory and motor aspects of the social engagement system.

SIMPLE Listening™ is an acronym for Somatic awareness; Intuitive inquiry; Mindful movement; Listen with whole body; Play and creative practice; Effortless action. It is more than active listening. It creates an embodied felt sense that we are part of an interconnected world in which all parts are important. When we feel connected to another, we are less likely to hurt that person. Because safety has been created, we have capacity to allow others to be different from us.

The basics of SIMPLE Listening™

There are very many exercises to choose from in the art of Simple Listening; all are designed to affect change in the autonomic nervous system. 

Somatic Awareness

Develop an awareness of the somatic impact of internal and external resources to create a safer inner and outer landscape. Breathing practices and body scans can support inner resources.

Intuitive Inquiry

Notice your gut feelings. Trust them. Be curious about how your internal landscape is reflected in the outer world. Listen for what’s not being said. This can be sometimes just as important as what is said. What does your body tell you about what’s going on?

Mindful movement

Our body movements change how our autonomic nervous system (ANS) reacts. For example, a practice of walking backwards for a few minutes each day or focusing on your peripheral vision as you walk, can support flexibility in the ANS.

Play and creative practice

By activating the neural vagal complex, play fosters feelings of safety, supports social engagement, and contributes to stress regulation.

Listening with the whole body

Listening with your whole body gives you more cues on how to respond. Try practicing mindfulness when listening to someone speak. When you give someone your full presence and attention they will trust you more, and literally be able to hear you better (because of the neural pathways coming on board).

Effortless action

The concept of wu wei wu, meaning action without action, originates from the ancient Taoist text of the Tao Te Ching. It is a paradoxical notion that suggests we can find greater ease and flow by finding the right balance between doing and not doing. Effortless action is more commonly known as a flow state. By letting go of the need to control every outcome, we can reduce stress and anxiety. Embracing the flow of events instead of resisting them can lead to a more peaceful mindset.

Simple Listening practices support a felt sense of the reciprocity of life, affording more choice, more diversity, and less division.